Love. 2 (Length Warning!)

Certain questions have plagued humanity since the beginning. Questions such as:

What is God?

What happens when we die?

And What is Love?

No one could ever explain Love sufficiently enough for me. Until I myself experienced it, it was indescribable. I take that back. Even after I’ve experienced it is indescribable. Until I fell in love, I never believed it possible to die of a broken heart. Now that I have love, I assure you that I could not live without it. You may think I am exaggerating but let me assure you: Though I may not die upon the instant, I would waste away, fading into nothing.

Some may say that what I feel is not love. That no one who has never dated several people could know; they have nothing to which to compare their feelings. Well let me tell the infamous Every-one something. It is possible. It is love. I know it with every fiber of my being. It is Every-one who creates the doubts and plants them in my mind, niggling away at my thoughts, though never my heart. My emotions have been in a turmoil because Every-one knows that you can’t marry your first love; it isn’t really love. Every-one knows you don’t fall in love at 19. Well, Every-one knows a lot of things. I am sure Every-one is more wise than I. Because Every-one knows the world is flat. Every-one knows the Universe revolves around the Earth. Every-one knows the Earth doesn’t grow. And Every-one knows that anyone who has not experienced some minor heart-break could possibly know what Love is.

Some may say that Every-one is correct. Some may say that I have nothing to which to compare my feelings, but I do. I have had crushes. I have felt sexual attraction to other people besides Luke. It is true that I never dated anyone other than him. But I’m certain I know the difference between Infatuation and Love. Between Lust and Love. Between a crush and Love. Some may say that I can’t be in love because I have never before been heart broken. You are wrong. I have been heart broken, though it was my fault, though I was helped along with Every-one. I have been heart broken. I thought it had been plucked from my chest and smashed to smithereens on the floor. And then someone reached inside me and twisted all the other organs into a knot. But that knot could not fill the empty space I felt. I have never cried so much in my entire life. Not when any family member or friend or pet died. Not when I’d been hurt physically. Never. I had never felt so miserable in my entire life. I won’t go into details. I shall not even tell you what happened, though Luke knows what I’m talking about, I think. He was the one who held me while I cried.

So let me tell you, I know the answer to What is Love. Though I am a writer, I would be hard pressed to express it in words. I’ve written poems about it. They are mere shadows of the heart of the matter. No word, no picture could express my feelings. None. Love isn’t a big enough word to encompass all my emotions. Love isn’t big enough to contain the sentiments felt by my heart of my soul. Only someone else who has experienced Love could understand. I know what Love is. Do you? Does Every-one?

*

Afterthought:

Love. Support. Desire. Passion. Encouragement. Affection. Tenderness. Caring. Compassion. Warmth. Strength. Devotion. Value. Fondness. Friendship. Esteem. Respect. Trust. Doting. Loyalty. Regard. Attachment. Acceptance. Intertwining fates. Bound Destinies.

To me, Love isn’t big enough to include fate, destiny. It isn't big enough for forever, for eternity.

It is true that I sometimes feel anger, irritation, annoyance, worry, frustration, stress, exasperation, and disappointment. However, It doesn't change my affection, my desire, my trust, my caring, etc. And it would never sway my love. So I say again: Do you know Love? Maybe you do. Does Every-one? Somehow, I don't think so.

Hemmingway Challenge: 6-word story

1.) Dear God, your daughter says 'hello."
2.) Then one day the stars changed.
3.) Let me hear your battle cry.

In case you were curious, here's my battle cry:

Rawrrrrrwahyahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!

Books. Read them.

Old Turtle
Compass Rose, Briar Rose, and Eternal Rose by Gail Dayton
Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse, and Braking Dawn by Stephenie Meyer
Veil of Roses
Good Omens by Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman
Lamb; the Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal by Christopher Moore
Moon Called by Patricia Briggs
Outlander by Diana Gabaldon
All the Miles Vorkosigan books by Lois McMaster Bujold
Here If You Need Me by Kate Braestrup
Catwitch

And so it was written

And So It Was Written.

"Excuse me, but when you say 'written,' do you mean in pen or pencil?"
Silence.
"Because, see, if it was pencil I can erase it, but if it was in pen then I have to cross it out. So which is it?"

The voice began again.
And So It Was Typed...

"Backspace. Or delete. Whichever you prefer."

The voice was beginning to be a bit agitated.
And So It Was Engraved In Stone

"Stone can be broken."

The voice almost screamed. It took a deep breath and stated firmly, though one could tell that it was severely harassed:
And So It Was!!!

"Says who?" came the indignant tone from below.

Another Poem. Untitled.

You are far away,
Farther than China
Or even the moon.

Without you the world is grey,
Dim as ash on a cloudy night.
My only hope is to see you soon.

In my dreams I can stray,
And close the gap between us
Where you brighten my sleep to noon.

But once I wake with the day,
You fade and the distance grows
Until not even imagination is immune.

Warning! Days in Calender Closer Than They Appear

Everything's happening so fast. Life is coming at me so fast. It's scary. There isn't enough time to do what needs to be done in the two years before the "real world" reaches me. So I look at things a day at a time. But that means that things get put off, forgotten, and there is no plan. There are so many things I need to do and not enough time in which to do them. I feel so lost. And I'm afraid. The years pass so quickly. I should still be a kid. I want to still be a kid sometimes. Other times I just want to let go and get it over with. Jump into the real world, right in the middle of the current. I am an incoming junior in college. It is too late this semester to start Teacher Certification. Next semester, I hope to (but have not done anything to work toward) Study Abroad. So that leaves Senior year. But teacher's cert. can't happen in one year. And we don't have the money for me to stay longer. We don't have the money for me to be going now. I've come this far, but I'm afraid and so I hang back. And yet Life is dragging me forward and I can't just stop.
Time is a funny thing. While it is happening it alternates between minutes going to slow and going to fast. But then you look back from where you're standing now and think "How did I get here? How did things progress so fast? Shouldn't I still be in Junior High?" Last year was one of the fastest ever and I fear that this one will be even faster. And I'm caught, being pulled along with it. Who knows where I'll end up. I only hope it will be in a place I want to be.

My God (A poem)

My God

The rising sun. The ocean. The night sky. The cherry tree in full blossom.
The delighted and joyous laughter of children. The light of a candle burning in the lonesome dark. The smile of a loved one. A hug from a friend. The voice of your lover. The cool touch of a gentle breeze on a hot day. A butterfly. Music. Color. Company and a warm blanket inside on a snowy evening. A good book in the sunny valley or on a rainy day. The flight of a heron. A kiss. Peace, Hope, and Love. These are Beauty. These are Life. These are God.