Warning! Days in Calender Closer Than They Appear

Everything's happening so fast. Life is coming at me so fast. It's scary. There isn't enough time to do what needs to be done in the two years before the "real world" reaches me. So I look at things a day at a time. But that means that things get put off, forgotten, and there is no plan. There are so many things I need to do and not enough time in which to do them. I feel so lost. And I'm afraid. The years pass so quickly. I should still be a kid. I want to still be a kid sometimes. Other times I just want to let go and get it over with. Jump into the real world, right in the middle of the current. I am an incoming junior in college. It is too late this semester to start Teacher Certification. Next semester, I hope to (but have not done anything to work toward) Study Abroad. So that leaves Senior year. But teacher's cert. can't happen in one year. And we don't have the money for me to stay longer. We don't have the money for me to be going now. I've come this far, but I'm afraid and so I hang back. And yet Life is dragging me forward and I can't just stop.
Time is a funny thing. While it is happening it alternates between minutes going to slow and going to fast. But then you look back from where you're standing now and think "How did I get here? How did things progress so fast? Shouldn't I still be in Junior High?" Last year was one of the fastest ever and I fear that this one will be even faster. And I'm caught, being pulled along with it. Who knows where I'll end up. I only hope it will be in a place I want to be.